Music Together Again and Again

I’m taking my six-month old to a Music Together class today. For those of you without children or those parents fortunate enough to avoid this ridiculousness, don’t rub it in. Music Together is a 45 minute class where parents dress up their children in the cutest outfits while throwing sweats on themselves that may or may not match. A “teacher” takes out props which range from a small drum, to a maraca , to a scarf, to who cares my daughter just eats it and we all bop along to a song. It was absolutely adorable the first time. The second time we went to class and heard the same exact music and played with the same exact toys that my baby slobbered all over it was not so fun. Besides, nobody commented on her adorable new outfit.

After the first class, the instructor passed out CDs and a booklet. At first I thought I had homework, but it was just the lyrics to the songs with the notes in case I wanted to practice on the piano that I don’t have. I was then advised to play the CD regularly so my child can recognize the songs. That worked for a little while.

There is some inverse proportion that the more annoying a song is, the catchier it is and the brighter my daughter’s face lights up at seeing it.

Today is a new semester or term of the class which means a fresh batch of annoying tunes. I am not entirely clear why I signed up, but I did. It’s easy. It’s close. It’s only 45 minutes. I like some of the moms. I like showing off my little Pookers’ outfits. Of course today I am so behind on the laundry she’s lucky she is not naked. Pookers is wearing a basic little dress from Old Navy. But of course she still looks adorable. (I am a mom.)

One mother who I respect because she seems educated and interesting thinks the class is educational. How much education is my 6 month old gaining from eating instruments in a group? Not much. But she does like to watch the bigger kids crawl around. If it is so educational, why is there one song with the biggest dangling participle in the chorus? Okay, there is the grammar snob in me. You may be asking yourself how can I be a grammar elitist when there are likely mistakes in this post. At least the tutoring company that I am blogging for points out lots of “corrections.” There stupid adjustments involve changing sentences around that are not necessarily grammatically incorrect. They just tend to dumb it down for the people reading their site – which I don’t think is really anyone other than spammers and consultants looking to steer people to their website. Enough about them. I don’t even know how long I want to continue writing for that site. After all, now I have my own site where I don’t have to make any corrections. Of course I am not getting paid for this. Yet. Unless I get my book deal. Are you an agent? A publisher? Know one? Please.

So this lame song has a chorus “I have a silly cat, I never know where he is at.” It drives me bonkers. I almost emailed the director to voice a concern, but I don’t have that much time on my hands. I am writing a second novel. And yes, I should be working on that now while Pookers is sleeping, but I am not. Maybe if I had a book deal. I thought of other rhymes that could work too. “I have a silly cat, I don’t know why he is so fat.” Or “I have a silly cat, he always wants me to give him a pat.” They just need to find another word that rhymes with cat, and I have to imagine there are at least a thousand words.

If you are reading this – and feel so motivated, I’d love to hear what you think would make a better match to “I have a silly cat, (fill in the blank)”

I should probably take advantage of my napping baby and brush my teeth this morning.

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