Frenemies and wedding drama

A friend from home is going through a ridiculous saga with her alleged best friend forcing my friend to drop out as maid of honor of the second person’s wedding which is a mere three weeks away.

It sucks. My friend is devastated.

Sometimes breaking up with a friend is harder then breaking up with a boyfriend, especially if there is such a long history.

Before, after and during my wedding, I had several friend casualties. Three girls, one who was definitely on the fence of being invited, the second one who I absolutely adored and the third one was invited because she asked me to be in her wedding and was so close to the second friend, walked out immediately after my ceremony. I was so worried something horrible had happened to them or their children or whatever. Turns out they felt uncomfortable because they were the only black people invited to my wedding.

Never mind that there were two flamboyantly dressed gay men, an Indian couple, a man who misunderstood “casual” and showed up in a T-shirt, orthodox rabbis and three women who should have known better than to wear white. They stayed and had a great time.

Two college friends also were very upset with me for reasons I am still not entirely clear on. I think one girl who was married a few weeks earlier and I was her maid of honor was upset because she was not THAT involved in the wedding whereas I was involved in her wedding. But she had every opportunity to participate, just not walk down the aisle because it was exclusively family.

The second girl who was part of our friend “trio” was upset, I think, because I pushed to invite her to the rehearsal dinner and make a speech. My family welcomed her warm and offered her a place to stay. She did not have a wedding, but I offered to join her when she had her civil service. After the wedding she proceeded to ignore all of my calls. I was devastated and kept trying to come up with possible explanations for her “disappearance”. It’s all in the past now, but it is still painful to recall.

But sometimes you have to cut bait. It’s easier for the bride to do this because she is in a happy place embarking on a new life, then say it is for the single friend. Especially when you are left with NO answers, only questions and confusion.


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