Perpetual Hold

Do you think certain companies have a button where they transfer you to waiting limbo? I struggle to decide which is worse, the perpetual ring, the annoying elevator music, dead silence, or a short riff that is repeated incessantly only to be interrupted by a recording promising that “someone will answer shortly.”

The silence makes me wonder if I’ve been disconnected and the other ones irritate me equally but at different times. I write this now as I am waiting for over ten minutes for an operator to pick up the phone so I can pay a bill. I want to give the company money and yet I have to wait for eternity. At least I have speaker phone.

Inevitably, the call waiting sound will beep and when I answer it on the second beep, the operator will have picked up the phone and then hung up in the split second it will take me to return to that line. Murphy’s law of holding.

The second law is that once you get through after eating up all of your cell phone minutes the operator will transfer you to another waiting hell.

It’s been over 12 minutes now and the ringing sound is grating on my nerves. I’ll just send a check in the mail.


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