Archive for January, 2010

Guilty Pleasures

January 27, 2010

There’s a jealous caddy bitch hiding behind my friendly encouraging demeanor.

I’m trying hard not to practice loshen hora, the idea of gossip but it goes against every natural instinct. I do feel better when I don’t indulge in this immature practice, especially when it involves me hitting my private mute button, but I love hearing stories and juice about other people, especially if it gives me an edge or confirms an ally.

Like Joan Didion, I could be a wallflower at an orgy.

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Slowly, Slowly returning

January 19, 2010

i haven’t looked at my novel in over a year. Once again, my mom’s death derailed me. I’m slowly getting organized with Quickbooks and gaining a better grasp on managing her business. The estate return was accepted. whoo hoo! Apparently an estate audit is awful so I’m thrilled to avoid that.

I’ve been thinking about my novel. I’ve talked about it. I’ve even purchased an out of print book that has a similar theme as mine. I haven’t opened it, but it’s on my shelf.

I’ve been reading more too. Joined a book club and have been knocking about books with a frequency that makes me proud. Not as proud as if I was writing that regularly.

Baby steps. At a certain point i will have to stop cutting myself so much slack. I heard Ricky Gervais say that he was slothful until he was 40 when he turned into a workaholic. So that gives me 9 more years to be drag at the writing and continue getting a grasp on motherhood, my mom’s business, my real estate business, and all that other jazz that inhibits me from writing.